08-19-04 - 09:11
"live backwards is evil. what does that mean to you."
my days now run togather. I no longer care that i don't know what day it is. it just dosen't matter anymore, so long as i do my job and don't die. that has kind of become my life here. lack of life rather. if i'm not on a mission i close myslef of in my room. yes i have my own space once more. thats the only perk to the new "job".
never can i get clean. no amount of cleaners can wash this film away. no matter how much i scream into the dark or blindly run in the night will there ever be a redemption. i came easy to give in and embrace the side of me that crys out for this. so damn easy. i don't remember what i use to be like, i can't really tell what i'm like now.
fuck it, rock and roll.
